Trust is defined by Webster as belief that someone or something is reliable, good, honest, effective, etc.
Trust in personal relationship is important.
Trust in business is absolutely essential if you hope to succeed long-term.
We often hear trainers and leaders speaking about the process of “Know – Like – Trust” that must occur before someone will Buy from you, or join you in business. What we don’t hear often enough is just how to get this trust – and keep it.
I recently caught a replay of Brené Brown’s Super Soul Session on The Anatomy of Trust (2015, OWN). She is a speaker, author and research professor at the University of Houston, best known academically for her research in vulnerability, courage, authenticity, and shame. You can find her best-selling books on Brené Brown’s author page on Amazon, including Daring Greatly and Rising Strong.
In Brené’s presentation during the Super Soul Session, she talked about Trust, and some of the elements that are important to build and keep trust in a relationship, business or personal. I’ve covered some of her key points here, and in the accompanying Trust Infographic: Building Trust In Business. As a bonus, I’ve included the SoundCloud recording of a recent community call I did with the Elite Marketing Pro community on this topic.
Brené developed an Acronym to help us remember the key elements in building a keeping Trust.
Boundaries, Reliability, Accountability, Vault, Integrity, Non-Judgment, Generosity
Here is how they break down…
Boundaries are to be respected. I must set and hold boundaries, and respect yours. I expect you to respect mine as well. When we allow others to push our boundaries, or we take advantage of another’s, this breaks down the trust between us.
Reliability is more than always giving someone’s kid a ride to school, or working concessions at the game. It’s about knowing your limitations, respecting them, and being realistic in your commitments. Often times when we come up short in a commitment, it’s because we’ve simply over-committed. Learning to say “no” when you are at full capacity can make you a more trustworthy business partner and friend.
Accountability means owning your behavior – good and bad. When you make a mistake, admit it, apologize and make amends. Allow me to do the same. When you say something like, “oh, don’t worry about it, I know you didn’t mean to do that,” you diminish the mutual trust in our relationship by not allowing me to own the behavior, apologize to you, and make amends.
Vault – The Vault is where we keep confidences. They do not exit after entering. This is a big one. Often times people are tempted to use “common enemy intimacy” within a group whereby they gossip about one person to gain the trust of another, enacting a “common enemy” of the one not present. However, if I do this to someone else, aren’t I highly likely to do it to you in the future? The Vault requires you to hold what I say in confidence, and for me to do the same for you. Period.
Integrity is simple to define, yet difficult to identify at times. We must both come from a place of Integrity if we are to build Trust. To have integrity, we must “practice what we preach,” and always choose courage over comfort and right over easy. The words are simple, but the practice can be tricky for some. There are no short-cuts to Integrity or Trust.
Non-Judgment refers to both people in the relationship. You must not judge yourself when you need help or me when I ask for it. If you need help, you should ask, and when I need help, you should give it, without judgment in either instance. There is no place in a Trusting relationship for feelings of superiority or pity when someone else needs your help, nor shame when you are the one who needs the help. Ask for it, give it and receive it with gratitude.
Generosity. This refers to you perception of my words and behaviors. You should always assume the most generous intentions in my words and actions, and then check in with me when those words and actions don’t align with what you expected from the relationship.
When we learn about the process of “Know – Like – Trust” in our business, it’s much easier to put it into practice with a road-map to follow. Brené Brown has given us an excellent map to follow in building Trust in our relationships, both business and personal. The process of developing Trust in your relationships is what will help you build a healthy business for the long term, and help your prospects and customers to distinguish you from crowd of marketers and networkers on the interwebs. Be authentic and trustworthy – future you will thank you immensely!
These are truly cornerstones of Attraction Marketing, and we teach all marketers who are new to the process of learning how to attract your ideal prospects and customers to you (instead of chasing them down – or away). When you build your business on trust and integrity, you will build a house of stone that can weather the inevitable storms down the road. If you take short-cuts and choose to practice outside of these parameters, you will simply build a house of cards that will blow away with the first strong wind. Choose wisely.
Here’s a little bonus for you. Elite Marketing Pro hosts a Daily Dose of Awesome call Monday through Friday at 12 Noon Eastern. (Just dial in and join the conversation: 721-775-7035, code 862645#.) I recently covered the Anatomy of Trust in one of these calls. You can listen to the recording below, and subscribe to the daily recordings on SoundCloud.
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Penny Kelley is a wife, mom, traffic coach, trainer, marketer, wine lover and soccer fan.
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